Wednesday, November 16, 2005
What I “Use-ta Think” Part I
When asked if I wanted to go to heaven someday, I asked for the option of coming back after a short visit there.
The way you got to heaven was Jesus flew down to get you and you put on your superman cape and flew up to heaven with him. Imagine my horror and grief when my sister sold my superman cape in our neighbor’s garage sale. I thought I had lost my salvation.
For those without superman capes, God made staircases (what I now know to be jet exhaust) for them to climb to heaven
When you “gave your offering to God” at church, the offering counters would put it in the plate and set it in the middle of the aisle after the church service and it would levitate up to heaven while the counters peeked through the sanctuary doors.
Witnessing to my friends meant taking my Sunday School book to school and telling everyone they better come to our bible study at recess if they didn’t want to go to hell.
What did you "Use-ta Think" about God and heaven?
(Next issue will address all the other aspects of life)